OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!!!!!!
That’s likely the first thought you have when you get engaged. What do you next? You call your parents, you call your best friend, you take pictures together and pictures of the rock. You change your Facebook status, and bask in the love from your friends and family. Then, the questions start coming in.
“Did you set a date?”
“Where are you getting married?”
“Who is in your wedding party?”
“What are your colors?”
And then…the panic sets in.
STOP. Don’t stress! Many details can wait, but here are the top five things you should tend to soon after you’ve gotten engaged:
1. Enjoy the moment.
First step? Chill. Go out to dinner. Bask in your newly-engaged glow. Gaze lovingly at each other and think, “OMG, this person is going to be my husband/wife!” Revel in the joy that you and your fiancé are feeling at this very moment – and make it a point not to talk wedding details. How long should you do this? At least a week. If you want, longer. In fact, other than the aforementioned best friend(s) and parents, you might even want to hold off on Facebook updates. As soon as you let the world in, that’s when the questions start – and along with them, the stress. You may want to hold off (at least a few days) just to enjoy each other, because as soon as you tell people, OH, the opinions. They will be offered – often and loudly.
2. Picture your perfect day.
Once you’ve shared the big news with everyone and things have calmed down, start dreaming of your perfect day. You and your fiancé should start thinking about what you want in your wedding. Do you picture it surrounded by tons of family and friends? Just the two of you on a beach? Or something in between, just immediate family and a few close friends? Now is a good time to collect ideas that inspire you and to learn what you want—and don’t want—in your wedding.
3. Budget, budget, budget.
I know, it’s not romantic, but it is vital to determine your overall budget before you move forward with any planning. Your budget will be your guide for every decision you make. Are the two of you paying for the wedding yourselves? Do you have family who is contributing? Is your fiancé’s family contributing? If you don’t know, it’s time for the tough conversations. NEVER make any assumptions about who is contributing to your wedding. Some parents will step up and offer a specific amount of money, some will offer an “unlimited” budget (even “unlimited” needs to be defined), or, they might not offer at all, waiting for you to come to them.
This is also the time to talk to your parents (if they are involved), about what your vision is for your wedding. Are you envisioning a small wedding in a garden while they’re picturing a large, extended family hotel ballroom wedding? It’s important to keep in mind that often the larger financial interest your parents have in the wedding, the larger “say” they will feel they have. If your visions don’t match up, be open to compromise. Yes, it’s “your” day, but they’ve likely dreamed about this day for a long time, too.
4. Start a guest list.
Once the budget and style of wedding have been determined, it’s time to create your guest list. You’ll need a general headcount before you begin your venue search – you need to know how large of a space you’re looking for. You don’t want to fall in love with a quirky little art gallery that holds 60 people standing for a cocktail reception when you’re planning on a 150 guest seated dinner, right? Be sure to get all parties involved – you, your fiancé, and all parents. Get everyone’s list, eliminate any duplicates, and have any discussions that need to be had (Mom, I haven’t seen those neighbors across the street in 30 years, do we really need to invite them?). Helpful hint: Ask parents to prioritize their list by breaking it into an A list, B list, etc. – it’ll help you make cuts later on.
5. Find a planner.
The earlier the better! A good wedding planner can take your guest list, budget and wedding style and help you find the perfect venue and vendors. They know how break down your budget and get you the most for your money.
Where do you find the right wedding planner? Start by asking friends who’ve gotten married in the area, and also check out the Heart of Frederick vendor guide. These planners know many venues and vendors in the Frederick area who can help you along your journey. If you’re looking outside of Frederick, check local blogs in those areas or check Wedding Wire for highly rated planners.
Remember, don’t stress! These are just a few tips to get you started. Congratulations on your engagement!
Written by Rebecca Dick, Party Planning Perfectionist at Blue Canary Special Events. Blue Canary Events is your key to a stress-free wedding. With years of event experience, our team has delivered a level of professionalism that is noted and appreciated by our couples and vendors. Ready to make your wedding reflect who you are, the experts at Blue Canary Events are here to keep you on track, help you organize your plan and carry out your vision. Our goal is for you to relax and enjoy your special day. Our competitive rates, award-winning planners and flexible approach make us a smart choice for any couple.